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The Wrong Goodbye

from Depraved Indifference by John XII

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Boxed in, locked out of a corridor but not yet dismissed. Flashlight duly monitoring, as my warden insists. At night in my wanderings, pacing, clenching fists. What use is there pondering justice in this City of Dis? Catalepsy of the soul, holding frozen in space. Splattered next to me, self-control - soldier nowhere, erased. As if I deserve this malice. As if my words disturbed the balance. You're curbing my inertia. Callous rubbed raw by my cowardice. Besmirched, devoured bliss. Bearer of earthly delights, spare them my god-given right. Ensnare us in rapturous light. Prepare me for cleansing this blight. Rob this narcissist of sight. We all see clearer when the outside world is grey. We all sleep soundly when the predator is prey. The snake choking on it's own tail in stunned disgrace, the circular argument swallowed in its place. Smite the serpent - leave him to be trampled beneath indifferent mobs. You can hear him pleading his ignorance between insufflated sobs. Ignite the final straw - fallacies in flames. Idiosyncrasies lay slain. Atrophied from a lifetime of lulling oneself into false acceptance of righteousness. It seems to be that when you promised me I'd earned my stripes that you meant the lash.

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from Depraved Indifference, released May 10, 2016

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John XII Toronto, Ontario

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